Hoard of Zĕmian Goodness - Hydra Cooperative

Not very long ago I wrote two reviews, appraising the work of +Chris Kutalik. The first was of the sprawling and chaotic Slumbering Ursine Dunes. The second review was of the excellent Fever-Dreaming Marlinko; a city supplement.

Since reviewing both works I have had the utmost pleasure of playing in one of Chris' "Misty Isles" playtests, as well as receiving an at-cost physical copy of both FDM and SUD.

Firstly, Chris' games are awesome. In the last year or so I have become quite bored of being a player. I get far more pleasure from creating and running games. The short game I had with Chris gave me faith in the simple pleasures of creating a character, and exploring crazy spheres. It was zany, it was imaginative, it was all the things I aspire to in my own games. Moreover, the experience gave me additional insights and contexts to Chris' works. On their own I initially found them to be disorientating at times — primarily due to a lack of geographic map within the work, and some in-jokes within the work itself. Since playing in one of this games, however, I understand the world and the references a lot more.

Likewise, I enjoyed the PDF copies of FDM and SUD, but having the physical products is another level. Both are around A5 size, with FDM being slightly bigger (as you can see in the photo above). They are attractively presented, and a joy to flick through. I have just started a city adventure with my current players, so I imagine FDM will be a constant at-the-table guide. In my opinion, the merits of this work are in its toolkit applicability rather than being a highly detailed and self-contained setting. It is the latter of course, but I find the work to be a great source of inspiration, rather a biblical dictum.

Do yourself a huge favour and pick up a copy of both. If I had to recommend only one, I would still go with Fever-Dreaming Marlinko. It is psychedelic and odd, but very versatile. And did I mention it was fun to flick through? 

"...Painting Dwarven Penis Runes On His Barn", Or More Politely "Slumbering Ursine Dunes: A Review"

Author: Chris Kutalik
Price: $9.00/$16.00 (Drivethrurpg)
Format: PDF/Print
Page count: 66
System: Hydra Cooperative (Labyrinth Lord)
Year: 2014

If the title of my review doesn't grab your attention, you won't like this module. It might seem like a debased attempt to get you to read this, and okay, maybe it was a little, but the quoted excerpt actually appears in this adventure. If on the other hand, the idea of a centaur enacting such immature pranks makes you chuckle a little, then you will probably gravitate towards this adventure. 

Some of you will remember I reviewed Hydra Collective's Hill Cantons Compendium II slightly over a month ago. In my review I discussed the overall humour of Chris Kutalik's writing, and my general attitude of propensity towards this work. Cantons has a very homely feel, and the compendium has recently been released in a print format, that personally I think looks Gorgeous. 

Needless to say, when +Chris Kutalik was kind enough to provide me with a review copy of Slumbering Ursine Dunes I was immediately excited. Why? Before I had read or even heard about Hill Cantons Compendium II, I had already had my gaze set on this adventure. I lavished the immediately evoking cover artwork, and plotted how I might be able to justify its purchase. Clearly, when the opportunity arose to delve into the content, I was game.

The Good
Slumbering Ursine Dunes presents itself as "a Labyrinth Lord adventure for levels 2-4". Like most products at least loosely affiliated with the OSR, or with old school gaming more broadly, there is an enjoyable cross-compatibility between many systems. Slumbering Ursine Dunes - or SUD as I will now refer to it - is no exception. The stat blocks and mechanical considerations are not the exclusive domain of Labyrinth Lord, but can be enjoyed with more or less any retro-clone or pre-2000 edition of Dungeons & Dragons. Even a 5th edition conversion would present scant difficulty. While this will be obvious to some, I do not wish to presume my readership possesses this knowledge or ability (though these types of conversions seem simian in execution), and some gamers expect exacting compatibility with their system of choice. Be advised this thing is easy to work with, but will require some work if you're not using Labyrinth Lord, OD&D or B/X. 

The layout of SUD reminds me of Hill Cantons, in fact I'm almost certain the type-font of the title and some of the interior is identical. Generally speaking the fonts are easy to read and the layout is solid. It didn't boggle the mind with its awesomeness but neither did I have any particular distaste for it. The tables have a nice shading, and are pleasant to read and interpret. Little grappling is required which is perfect for the gaming table. The cartography is reasonable, being functional and clear. Personally I found the visual highlight to be the artwork. There is an off-beat consistency to the pieces which drew me into the adventure immediately. The front and back cover have an unnameable reminiscence. It's not 'old school' per se, but it begs the viewer to immerse themselves within the setting, and alludes to old tales found in dusty books. The pieces range from mysterious, weird, and terrifying. Like good RPG artwork it transports the reader to another place, and stimulates the imagination in useful ways. The artwork alone sold me on this product. I'm very picky when it comes to this, so that is high praise. Artwork is incredibly important to me in determining the feel of a product, in digesting it, and relating to it on a visceral level. SUD does this well. Any money Kutalik (and co?) spent commissioning artwork was well worth it. Because the illustrations depart from some of the artistic boringness associated with other OSR offerings I feel this product (and probably the rest of Kutalik's work) has made some important headway within the 'scene'. Like Hill Cantons it requires you to leave your notions at the door. That's important, because rather than rehashing the same old tropes, this one will leave you guessing. 

Okay, enough blabbering about artwork. You want to know about the content don't you?

Alright, alright... 

Slumbering Ursine Dunes put simply, is an "open-ended mini-sandbox adventure". When I read something that forces me to break out a dictionary (albeit online) I'm happy. This work forced me to do so on at least two occasions (that I'm willing to admit anyway). First, curious about the title, I had to look up what "ursine" means. For those interested it means "bear-like". This is suitable as one of the major features within this work is the yearly pilgrimage of "soldier-bears" within the dunes. The second word beyond my literacy was "Sisyphean" which means "endlessly laborious or futile". This word was used to describe the consistent insurmountability of mounting the dunes without the aid of magic. It's possible but takes a damn-long time. Already we get a sense of the place. The environment is harsh, and hey, there's bear-dudes. 


Kutalik's typically facetious and largely parodic prose surfaces in this work. I imagine he's the type of man who doesn't take himself too seriously. I can't decide whether I'd want to play in his games or not: on the one hand I imagine spending most of a session in varying states of laugher, whether that would be a small giggle or an outright ROFLMAO I can't be certain; or else he would be laughing at the party's attempts to adventure in his strange worlds. Comments like "the imaginatively-named Misty Isles.." or "Kůň is a greedy fuck" made me laugh. This is someone I can relate to. Whether Kutalik's intention or not, I could see myself within this narrative being the DM: "I need a name for this place...hmm...there are islands and there's a mist. I know! 'The Misty Isles'. It's slightly prosaic, but it will do".


It's funny, bordering on ridiculous, at times. Even if you never run this you'll probably laugh a few times. Discoverable items like the silver ball that induces an orgasmic sensation upon the wielder are the types of tongue-in-cheek, stupid but funny type of things you may expect within this package...

The text begins with the background and lore of the Dunes, going further to detail a few major players in the dunes. A table of rumours is provided - following the true/false dichotomy of older-era modules. A 'Wandering Critter Encounter' table follows with some usual and not-so-usual creatures. What I especially enjoy about the first part is the distinct flavour of the factions and creatures that inhabit the dunes.  

SUD uses a point-crawl system. Rather than providing a traditional hex-based map with adjoining hexes in every direction, the map provides a road map of sorts to the notable points of interest. Getting between each node may be a mini-adventure itself, though it's somewhat presumed these travels will be largely arduous. This is a logical choice for an adventure of this sort, and is probably easier to describe than a hex-based map may have been.

The dunes' locales are generally distinct and interesting. Any mention of a half-mad priestly hermit type will have me instantly interested, so it should be no surprise I was happy to read about one among the nodes. It was accompanied by one of my favourite illustrations within the book too, only rivalling the cover image for best piece. There is a strange hermit in an adventure I've personally been writing this year, so it's good to see a kindred adventure-writer. There are two points of interest particularly detailed: that of the Golden Barge and Glittering Tower. The Golden Barge has creatures called 'ghuls' aboard, some of whom attack with meat skewers and use their faeces to fuel the barge.Conversely the Glittering Tower is guarded by bear soldiers. The whole area oozes oddities and reeks of the bizarre. Centaurs charge travellers a toll, while the 'Chaos Index', aka the 'shit gets weird' table, ensures all sorts of strange events will occur within the dunes. In other words this place is unpredictable at best, and utterly deadly on a bad day. A bestiary outlines new monsters and creatures, while there are two new playable classes (for Labyrinth Lord, but obviously adaptable for OD&D, B/X, etc). The back end of the book contains pre-gens so you can whip a henchperson up in a jiffy, or use them as PCs for your lazy players. The other stuff was cool too, but I don't want to spoil the surprises it if you're planning on playing or buying this.

The Bad
I have a similar critique with Slumbering Ursine Dunes that I did with Hill Cantons: there were times where I felt somewhat external to the text. Because this work is surely based on Kutalik's own campaigns there appeared to be a level of insider knowledge I felt I was missing, but did not necessarily need. Let me be clear: the work in itself is complete and comprehensive, but at times I wished I had been part of the play tests. In a backhanded way perhaps I'm complimenting Kutalik, because his campaigns seem imaginative and like a lot of fun. But I do feel future works would benefit from an outside perspective to make it as digestible and understandable as possible. At times I became confused, especially around some of the mythologies, factions and key NPCs. This was due in part to the writing style and layout, but generally a bit of cross-referencing here and there clarified most ambiguity. In the spirit of transparency and fairness I was reading this on two occasions while very tired, so that undoubtedly contributed. 

Final Thoughts
I like Chris Kutalik's creations. Primarily they are imaginative, quirky and interesting. You truly never know what to expect; a genuine breath of fresh breath air in a sometimes stale scene. His work breaks outside of the boring fantasy tropes that have become associated with D&D. His work is important because it offers something fresh and different. It refuses to oblige with tradition or convention, and is brave enough to try something new. Please, do yourself a favour, and at least check out Hill Cantons Compendium II. While Slumbering Ursine Dunes is a very different piece for a number of reasons, the former will provide you with a sense of Kutalik's style. If it's to your liking I imagine you'll gravitate towards Slumbering Ursine Dunges. I'm looking forward to inflicting this on my players in my Astonishing Swordsmen & Sorcerers of Hyperborea Campaign, and if you've enjoyed what I've written, you should too.

Now I need to buy myself a damned print copy!

Hill Cantons Compendium II - Review

Hill Cantons Compendium II - Review

Author/s: Chris Kutalik & Mike Davison (Hydra Collective LLC)
Price: $0 - Pay what you want
Format: PDF
Page count: 21
System: OSR (0e/1e/insert retroclone here)
Year: 2015

Procrastination is a funny thing - you often end up places you would not expect to. Today was no exception, as I stumbled upon the Hill Cantons Compendium II. The PDF is free to download, and for anyone running a 0e-styled game (or AD&D or Labyrinth Lord or whatever) I recommend checking it out. Actually, you know what? Check it out even if you're not running any of those systems.

You may be asking why. Well, for starters it's free. If that isn't appealing enough, then how about the fact it includes a very brief setting overview, a bunch of new classes, and a whole swathe of random tables?

The Good.
Right off the bat I'm going to say it: I like this. When I began reading I thought okay, another home-brew setting where I don't understand the in-joke references, but between that thought and finishing my read-through, something clicked. I like how sparsely defined the setting is, and while I would never use it (because I have my own imagination, and thrive on designing my own settings), it had some interesting bits that I would certainly steal - like the idea that there is a rather 'normal', seemingly magic-less hub of civilisation, whereupon the further one ventures out things get weirder and weirder. It describes in loose terms the socio-political setup, and the idea of 'hostels' - multi-storied buildings of (usually) ascending swankiness. The world seems to be an amalgam of weird fiction, sci-fi and swords & sorcery, with some more traditional fantasy tropes, but due to the brevity of the work it's a little difficult to be certain.

Then it gets really fun. The Compendium adds some new classes like the Black Hobbit - chaotic and black-hearted halflings; Chaos Monk - think bad 80s kung-fu movie characters made into a class; Feral Dwarf - crude, cave-men dwarves; Half-Ogre - mank, stinky, disgusting beings; Mountebank - illusory trickster; Pantless Barbarian - the name really says it all; Robo-Dwarves, War Bear and White Wizard - magic-user/cleric/druid combo. My personal favourites were the Black Hobbits (the little bastards), the Pantless Barbarians (because LOL), White Wizard (I've long thought the cleric class should be ditched and replaced with a magic-user class who can cast cleric spells too), and the Mountebank (cos I love all things thief). I found myself knee-deep in half-ogre faeces, chuckling to myself at a few things written therein. It's quite tongue-in-cheek, and very self-conscious.

The tables too, make a great addition to this compendium, and I can see myself using them just for NPCs: "Bob looks at you with..." *rolls dice* "...sad eyes - 'my parents didn't love me', he finishes".

The compendium is funny, useful and even rather innovative (if I may use that word, despite the fact EVERYTHING under the sun has been done already).

The Bad.
When something is free, one shouldn't really complain. However, I'm still of the opinion if you're going to bother with something do it right. My only complaint, if it even is a complaint, is at times I felt a little excluded from the text, almost as if this was used in a campaign, but then wasn't properly or extensively explained to the intended audience. Then again, I've been doing this hobby long enough that I actually don't care. I'm an adult, I don't need to be spoon-fed by a gaming company, and I can sift through the ideas to find the gems; which in this case is very easy to do. I noticed a few proofreading errors here and there, though honestly no more (or less) than my Adventures in Highwold supplement. The description for Isle of Tolmin and the House of the Axe was completely omitted. Is that a big deal? No. I didn't pay for it. Too, given my own experiences with writing and self-publishing, once something is 'complete' and published, it's only then that you notice the mistakes, but by that time you really can't be assed to correct it.

Conclusion.
You still haven't downloaded it??!

But seriously.